Wedding Wednesday: Just Married!!

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photo by jodi mckee

So um, guys? We’re MARRIED. And I have to say that it was the happiest, most love- and joy-filled day either of us has ever experienced. I don’t know if I’ve ever smiled so big or felt so happy, ever. Everyone said the day would fly by, and that we should remember to breathe and stay in the moment, because we’d forget it all so quickly… but neither Dan nor I felt that way on Sunday. The day felt long and full and slow and so very clear. And everything went so smoothly from start to finish. Maybe that eerie calm I felt leading up to the wedding was my heart’s subconscious way of moderating my bad habit of setting expectations so high that I’ll only end up disappointed… because even though I know I’m sounding gushy, I don’t care, but things went BETTER than I could ever have expected. I mean, we thought the ceremony would be meaningful, and that our vows would be personal, and that a brewery reception would be cool… but the ceremony was like an arrow through our hearts, and our vows made everyone (including ourselves) tear up, and the brewery was AMAZING. I never expected it would be SO GOOD.

I have a million things to say (obviously) but since Dan and I had the same five favorite moments of the day, I thought I’d share those instead:

  1. Our first look. We decided to see each other before the ceremony, and to have the photographers take a picture. It seemed like it would make the day go more smoothly, even if it’s not as traditional, and I am SO GLAD we did this. I think it made us both infinitely more relaxed… and I’ll never, ever forget that nervous, shaky, excited feeling of seeing him for the first time, talking in hushed tones with tears in our eyes, kissing Dan and having him holding my hand, “dude we’re getting married” “you look so beautiful”.
  2. Our vows. We were nervous to write our own vows, to capture that balance between personal, heartfelt, funny, and full of the real promises. We wrote them for each other, of course, but I never could have predicted how many people would tell us afterwards how meaningful they were to them. I read mine without crying, somehow, and hearing Dan’s wonderful-sounding voice say his to me was just one of those once in a lifetime moments.
  3. Looking down from the balcony during cocktail hour. Right after we got to the cocktail hour, we went up to the balcony to take some pictures of the two of us. The brewery has a long balcony that overlooks both bars (and the area they cleared out to make our dance floor). Leaning over that railing with Dan’s arms around me, seeing the brewery we both love filled to the brim with the PEOPLE we love – laughing, talking, music playing, beer flowing, food being passed around – it filled us both with such joy.
  4. The speeches. My sister and Dan’s brother gave AMAZING speeches. Lindsey’s was three pages of awesomeness, and she made me cry and made me laugh… and Dave said his from memory and told stories of the three brothers as kids, and talked about me and Dan from his perspective as Dan’s roommate for much of our relationship. It was so heartfelt and made us both feel so loved, both by the two of them, but to know that others notice how happy we make each other.
  5. The brewhouse photos. The brewery has its own brewhouse, of course, and the vats are behind glass on a raised platform behind the bar. We got to go in there with our photographer for pictures, and it was SUPER fun, not just to get the secret tour, but also to be behind the glass above/behind the bar and wave like fools at all of our friends who were AT the bar.

So yeah. I’m riding this wave of happy like there’s no tomorrow. I knew it’d be awesome, but I honestly had no idea it would feel like this, and for that, I am infinitely, forever grateful.

Wedding Wednesday: The Final Countdown

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Dudes.

I don’t know what else to say. There are all sorts of things I want to tell you about, like the photos we’ve been taking and printing to have on display at the reception, or how my dress turned out in the end, or how I can’t for the life of me choose a lipstick color, or how we reluctantly ended up completely redoing our placecards….

People keep remarking on how calm I am, how I’m still able to function normally, and mostly I just laugh because I’m shocked that I’m giving off that impression. It’s not like I’m sitting here with an internal monologue like “I’m going to be the bride” on repeat, I couldn’t even tell you what’s in my head. Just that it’s like static in there.

I’ve started saying things to Dan like, “this is your last Wednesday as a single dude!” while thinking “this is my last day of work as Elizabeth T”. Ever.

It’s just all so Big. Everything is going to change, and as crazy as that is, it’s pretty much the best thing. Ever.

So. You know. Hearts and stars exploding out my eyes and ears and stuff. I’ll see you on the other side. :)

So This is the New Year

Somehow, 2012 was both awesome and difficult. It will forever go down as the year we got engaged and planned our wedding, the year my sister and Dan’s sister got married, the year of the hurricane, the year I went back to my old job. Big Change and Life Events together manage to be super exciting and super stressful at the same time, and it has been hard, sometimes, to focus on the fun parts instead of being weighed down by the nitty gritty details and compromises and maybe you can’t always have it the way you wants, and no you can’t know everything in advance.

So 2012 was crazy and exactly what I expected and yet not what I expected at all. It was kind of exhausting, to be honest. I’m not really all that sad to see it go, mostly because I really, really can’t wait for the things that 2013 has in store.

Starting the year off by marrying Dan is so impossible to conceptualize and wait wait I need more time and also I can’t WAIT for it to be here.

I felt compelled this year for the first time ever to jump on the “one little word” bandwagon. At the end of an exhausting year, having an intention for this new year feels important to me. I signed up for Ali Edwards’s One Little Word class, and I’m really looking forward to it. I chose moment for 2013 – to remind me to pause, to be in the moment, to really savor the momentous things 2013 has in store. It has been too easy this past year to let myself focus on the stress, on the tired, on the “when will my time be mine again?”. I know that things may not ACTUALLY slow down for us this year, with house hunting and who knows what else on our horizon, but I’m looking forward to figuring out what our new normal will be. And to making an effort to enjoy all of the big and little moments 2013 may bring.

Happy, happy new year, dudes.